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Daily Joke – Joan Rivers

September 9, 2014

“I’ve had so much plastic surgery, when I die they will donate my body to Tupperware.”

“I hate housework! You make the beds, you do the dishes and six months later you have to start all over again.”

“I blame my mother for my poor sex life. All she told me was ‘the man goes on top and the woman underneath.’ For three years my husband and I slept in bunk beds.”

“My husband wanted to be cremated. I told him I’d scatter his ashes at Neiman Marcus – that way, I’d visit him every day.”

Farewell, Joan Rivers

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